I DON'T LIKE....

                                                                          

Sometimes people are unable to understand the dilemma of life. Exactly, bole toh, what's happening to them..
It's time,we all need to do some soul searching.
Now what exactly is soul searching?
It is about being 100% honest with yourself. As we all know, that we have a conscious and sub-conscious level in our mind. Conscious level is from where we think what is right and what is wrong.It is governed by rules, rules made by society, family or can be your own(out of experience). Sometimes we follow these rules and sometimes we don't. 
Subconscious level is the inner layer, of which people generally don't feel any need or pay any heed. That is the level, where your reality lies. The purpose of life is not just to determine right and wrong. 
There is no right and no wrong. It is what suits you becomes your right and wrong.
So, to dwell into your subconscious mind and to identify what exactly you want out of your life and what you want to make of it, is the quest we all embark on. Or, we can say the very purpose of life!!
A very frequent question that people ask me:

"Beta gyaan toh de diya , yeh bh toh bta kaise"

Well, Its very simple. All you need to do, is to hit and try. Now, that doesn't sound easy. Definitely not, but its fun, and the fun element makes it easy.

Do something new everyday or try something new everyday(everyday sounds difficult again...make it alternative days or weekly).This will keep your mind active, and on the right track of your quest.It will inspire you everyday and satisfy you. You may not know what you like, but you will definitely know,what you dislike. This is the very first step, of Soul Searching.

A very recent experience where I was unable to fit into my jeans, and when I managed to, I seriously disliked the shape of my jeans. So, instead of buying new one(as bankruptcy is the in-thing now days), I decided to hit the gym for instant results. My very close friend 'S' warned me....some zillion times...I was like let me try. I tried for 3 days, and after 3 days I got to know what I don't like!!

And went back to my previous love, nature/park/jogging/walking!! Sometimes, to know what you like , you need to know what you don't like...So come out of your comfort zone and play with your dislikes!

Again....

"Free advice hai ....lena hai toh lelo warna chod do"

I day dream everyday....

                                                               

                                                     
Always picture your life the way you want it to be, it will revive you and your life towards hope!! 
Not many people get to live the life they want it to be, and sometimes feel bad. Day dreaming is an art where you find peace and solace in the darkest hour of your life.
In case, you haven't tried this before, trust me , it will help!!

"Free advice hai ..lena hai toh lelo..warna chod dho"

                                                                                                                                      

Power to choose

Lately, I had a very enlightening conversation with my manager.

Manager: okay, I will see what can I do for your project, but, if you remember you went to
                 H.R regarding your issues last time.

Me: Yes, I had doubts, so I asked her few questions.

Manager: See, you can go to your managers, or you can come to me, but going to H.R!!
                Many people will not like it!!

I was amazed at the audacity of that man, who had very tactfully enlightened me that it was my biggest mistake to go to H.R, and, in future, if I do so, I should better be aware of the consequences.

That very moment, I felt, the double standards and moreover I felt my helplessness.

What one can do!!!

I am sure all of us have been there. That one defining moment where one had 2 choices: either accept the way it is or fight back!!!Some of these choices you are very proud of and some of it go in vain.

One of the very proud choices that I made was joining Shiamak  Davar dancing classes which has definitely fetch me a lot of appreciation! But, Nothing comes easy, neither this one.

As, I was going through Delhi times, I came across this enrollment ad from Shiamak Davar, I asked my parents. To my surprise, they agreed in one go, though, they have always felt that such things are waste of time and money.

My first class was amazing so was my entire batch. From instructor to students, it was like all together a different world. A world that taught me so much, that moulded my personality. Of all the things that I learned, one was:

                        “Invest in learning; it will add youth to your life”

The night my performance ended, I could feel the void; there will be no more classes ,no more fun, and no more learning. My parents straight away said ‘NO’ for another batch and denied any financial help. But, the desire to perform again, in front of huge audience, drove me insanely towards it.

                        ‘Believe in your dreams, there is always a way’

I shared my grief with my friend, and he told me to work with Shiamak as PR to fund my fees. But it was in Gurgaon, I have to take 10 minute bus ride till AIIMS metro station and then 40 minute metro ride till Huda city centre and then 15 minutes’ walk towards the center.

“I'll do it”. Those were my words, I never knew, where it came from.

“Take that one step and god will make everything fall in the right place”

But the battle had never been easy, now that I have deduced the way, how would I convince my parents who were pursuing me to join MBA coaching classes! Funny life!!

They instantly said ‘NO’, the way I said ‘NO’ for MBA. I begged and begged and did all the drama I could. And, then I delivered the million dollar dialogue, “I want to stand on my own feet, let me experience the hardship of the outside world”. Trust me it will work every time.

‘Pursue till you die; Nobody can take away the power of persuasion from you’

I struggled to travel from south Delhi to Gurgaon, I was exhausted. But, I managed to complete the 15 day tenure and got myself enrolled. There was this little secret that I didn't disclose to my parents, that I wanted to be a part of the professional group of Shiamak- ‘THE SPB’.

After this show, I was selected by ‘Marzi Pestonji’ for the auditions of SPB,after getting rejected twice.

My parents didn't approve again!!!They clearly blacklisted the option of dancing for me. I told them this is just an audition and nothing else, I will forget about dance after this (In my funny little head, I said “Kidding”). Thinking that this will end my madness, they approved again.

Luckily, I got selected, and another round of persuasion started. This time my parents were serious, they didn't let me join. They discouraged and scolded me every time I talked about it. I didn't join that one batch, that meant a whole world to me at that time. But, you know what, I had HOPE!!!!

“Don’t lose hope is the moral of the Story”

So, When the next batch started, the summer funk, I knew this was my last chance, either I will do SPB or will lose it forever. I pursued my parents again, this time, ‘I am at your mercy’ blackmail; I told them this is actually going to be the last (As I was moving out of the city for job). Again, to my surprise, they gave up, don’t know for what reasons. I lived my dream and the life that I always dreamt.

A dancer last for maximum 3 minutes on stage, and it took 3 months to prepare that piece. That is the beauty of dance.

Remember, in the end, that we choose every day! Every day gives us an opportunity to make things right.

I made my choice, the choice which was not realistic, with the educational background I had. In that, I made my way. Today I realized maybe it was not for the dance, not for the SPB,….but sometimes it is for the journey.

A journey of self-discovery……………………and that was my CHOICE!!!

                                                           

Let It GO………

                             

Lately, in a conversation with a friend, I came to know about his state, that we all have experienced in our life. This is the state where we are stuck in our memories, where we still live in, and expect people to come back.

Technically, that feeling is a recorded version of what we have felt when we were with them or when we were in that situation. We long for that feeling again, and when we are unable to achieve it, we mourn!!

So, what exactly that state is?

We think about them over and over again, it brings a smile to your face and the very next moment you realise that you are no more there. That is called the Hung-up zone.

Hung-up zone is the zone where our subconscious mind still expects people to come back to us, when actually, they have already moved on.

So, what do we do now??? Move on!!

 Sounded easy…….yes, it’s easy to say, but there are ways to make it easy as well.

All we need to do is to paint new and better memories, following will help you do it:

1)      Jab we met

Yes, that movie taught something very stupid yet interesting fact about human nature.

It taught us, that you can’t keep holding to that person or to their blah things; because there is more to life.

It’s true that whenever you throw away or burn the things, that the person has gifted you at one point of time, gives you immense peace and an understanding that you have the courage to part your ways.

Once you stop seeing those things around you, you have won half of the battle, as we know, “Out of sight, out of mind”.

2)      Stop visiting their profile

We all are desperate to have their one glimpse, to know what’s up with them. Social networking sites has definitely given us the privilege to get a sneak-peak in their life.

So, just stop looking around, either you control your instincts or ‘unfriend’/block that person, so that, their memories never haunts you again!!!

3)      Write….

Yes, it helps. Maintain a diary where you pen down all the positive things that happened to you in that day. No matter how small that one particular act was, it actually brought positivity in your life.

If it gets hard to pen- down anything, then, try again.

Keep thinking, and searching for that one moment where you smiled because of no reason.

We all have that one magical moment daily where we are given an opportunity to make things better.

In no time, that one moment turns into splendid moments. So, identify that one moment, and jot it down in your diary.

4)      Busy….Busy….Busy

No……..No, don’t exhaust yourself. Don’t get consumed under the burden of work. When it comes to keeping yourself busy, it means doing things that you have not done before.

Trust me, there is no fun, staying in your comfort zone!

Challenge yourself with things that you have never done before.

Whether it is, asking out somebody for a coffee? Public Speaking? Para-sailing or dance classes? Road trip?

There are millions of things that a person hasn't experienced in their short span of life.

Take this as an opportunity, to explore you potential to the fullest.

5)      Meet new People……

The relationship or the tough times has taken away the trust, you once had over life.

People distance themselves, guarding oneself from another mishap.

I wonder at times whether it ever did GOOD!!

According to me, safe-guarding yourself is a never a bad option. We all need some time to come out of it. It is called the transition.

But, transition has its own stipulated time. Don’t hold on to it.

Meet new people; ask about their passion and their achievements.

Well, One can do some healthy flirting too (till somebody is taking it in right spirit).

As,Ranbir Kapoor says, “It’s good for your health, just like yoga”

6)      Take a step back

After years of waiting or say months or days, where you are actually near the closure, that person comes back and asks for another chance.

Are you confused?? What to do now???

Well, the answer is very simple, the person who left you in your darkest hour, doesn't deserve to be with the new and better version of you.

I know it’s confusing and irritating.

But, then just believe in yourself, and think that you are the most beautiful/handsome person in this world, who deserves way too better.

Take the last sigh of that feeling and put yourself together to make it happen. Things will start showing in your favour only when you will take a step ahead and make it happen. Below are excerpts from a beautiful song, ‘I should go’ which inspires all of us to move ahead in life and never look back.

Before my will gets any weaker
And my eyes begin to linger
Longer than they should
I should go
Before I lose my sense of reason
And this hour holds more meaning
Than it ever could
I should go
I should go

What’s gone is gone forever; don’t make it your destiny but a closed chapter that taught you something about life.

“It’s not until we have lost someone, that we are able to enjoy the feeling of finding somebody better and worthy, again.”